I can help share some insights about bank reconciliation in QuickBooks.
In QuickBooks Desktop, once the transactions are downloaded from the bank, you can add/approve to reconcile it directly.
There are instances wherein you need to review the transactions in QuickBooks first if it's a possible match. If it's not, you'll have to select another existing transaction before doing the reconciliation.
I'm including some related articles below for more information about handling and reconciling transactions.
I already matched and accepted the transactions, but when I go to do the bank rec I still have to "mark" each transaction to show it cleared... doesn't qb already know it cleared because I downloaded it from the bank ?